Sunday, August 5, 2012

Day 20 - Powdered Donuts Can't Get Me...

Muuhahhhhahahhaha.

That's my evil laugh (if ya didn't know).

So let me tell you a little story...er...a long story, but worth it, I promise:

The day after Gary and I returned from the Philly Casting Call (for Biggest Loser 14, and yes, someday I'll share that story OR you'll have to wait for the book...) I went to the grocery store.

I went to the grocery store to purchase food (uh, duh, right?).

Healthy food. Veggies and Protein and Gluten free pasta, oh my.

I did all that.

I also purchased a bag of Hostess Powdered Donettes. You know, the mini powdered, cakey, oh so GOOD donuts that come in a bag of 20. I love these little donuts; these one bite donuts of goodness. I love them so much that on many occasions in the past I have eaten an entire bag in one sitting.

Yep sirreeee, I have.

So I got home and put all the groceries away, including those tasty treats of sweet goodness, and continued on with my life.

I was beginning the rest of my life that day and I was entirely prepared for what was to come...this time. I mean it.

Fast forward two weeks.

I found that bag of donuts while digging for some white rice one night.

"Oh, yah", I thought, "I remember these. Well, I'm not in the mood for them, now, so they can just sit there some more."

And they did. For another whole week.

And then I received a visitor of the cranky, crampy, downright bitchy kind. Yet I still didn't think about the donuts. Mags had found them earlier in the week and even she didn't say anything about them, knowing mommy was on a mission.

Then comes day two of Aunt Flo's visit.

I thought about those darn donuts all day long. I spent hours (in my head) discussing whether I should crack that bag. WHY I should crack that bag. IF I cracked the bag, how I could restrain myself from eating the WHOLE DARN bag.

By the time Gary got home from work I was ready for donuts. I told him during dinner that I had thought about those (by now, stale old donuts) all day long and after much reflection, decided that I could have 8 donuts with a glass of milk and still be under my calorie count for the day. This would satisfy the Auntie and I wouldn't be going crazy (like eating the entire bag).

HE said, "why don't you split that in half then, and just have four."

Hmmm...that's a thought.

So I went about doing my nightly things, including tucking Punky into bed. And then I went downstairs and got that bag of donuts out of the cupboard, grabbed a solo cup to measure out some milk, and having done so (5 ounces of 1%)...

Proceeded to place 2 of those OH SO TASTY, GOTTA HAVE 'EM donuts onto a plate and went upstairs to watch the Olympics with Papi.

I'm not sure who got more applause that night, me or Missy Franklin. But I can tell you that I savored every bite of those two donuts and drank every drop of that milk.

The donuts?

Were stale. Still worth it for the moment. But then I realized...

I've GOT this. I can DO this. I can be a food addict who recognizes my issues and works daily (moment by moment) to overcome my problem.

I may falter, I may fight, I may twist and turn and justify till I'm blue in the face.

And once in awhile, I may even give in.

But I will not fail. I will not allow those donuts or anything else to get in the way of my end goal.

Today?

Those donuts hit the trash. Stale old donuts that I wouldn't even let Mags eat. (Oh how she tried to wheedle just one...)

I'm teary-eyed at the end of this post. Sounds silly, right?

Maybe. But maybe you've been there too.

So here's to us. To overcoming temptations, hollow justifications, and (incredibly strong) weaknesses.

We can DO this. WE are worth the struggle and we WILL win this fight.

Till next time!


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August 100 Miles Challenge Update: 

Sandi:   9 miles

Anna:  24.6 miles

Kathy:  6 miles

Steffie: 14 miles 

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Remember, if you want me to track your miles for August, just shoot me a note and I will add you to the blog. If you are here already and I've got your numbers wrong, just shoot me...no, no, just let me know and I'll change it. I'm good with that. Cheers!

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No Big Bad Wolf is Going to Get ME!

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